altimit | (no subject)

Entry tags:

dungeon

(no subject)

Who 🍰 owen & frenemies
What 🍬 area explores, depressing conversations, quests???
When 🍭 August
Where 🍫 Lumina Cloth, et cetera
Content Warnings 🥧 Owen, discussions of suicide/suicidial ideation, violence & death, potentially other things that will be updated as needed.

Wildcard me! This will also be where I put open prompts, should I write any unrelated to the event. I might also add more top levels in the body! Hooray! Feel free to hit me on the plotting post, or on discord and plurk, both

revelries.

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[Continued from here.]

Just because it has a nice ring to it doesn't mean it's true.

[But he will lead Anaido away from the party, only sparing one glance behind him to make sure he's actually being followed. There's not a lot of quiet places around Lumina Cloth, but he takes them away from the casinos and towards one of the arenas, currently empty.

He takes a seat in the stands, finally looking at the older man.]

...You said you sometimes feel like giving up on life. But have you ever tried?

[Just immediately asking the most personal question he can in that conversation, I guess!!]

[ On the one hand: the "freedom" keyword appearing from a dodgy account like that should have been the reddest of red flags.

On the other hand: what's the point in playing an exploration game and not exploring? The worst that could happen (or so assumed the innocent Michel of five minutes earlier) was getting PK'd. He would respawn none the worse for wear after only a mild inconvenience. So he idly randomizes Hidden Joyous Freedom, fully expecting that even if others were trying the same keyword, they were unlikely to land at the exact same dungeon. The odds are -- what, one in four-hundred, approximately?

The fault is probably Michel's, for forgetting that he's never been a lucky man. He blinks at the Macabre Dancer who seems to have loaded into the same level, taking a moment to skim through the player information. ]

You. The yaoi man.

[The drop of the keywords is suspicious, but the reaction from those who tried the keywords... It all made Owen curious. He had to see for himself, because everyone else was being so cagey. It can't possibly be that bad, but if it is... he still wants to know.

So he loads into an Area, picking the keywords at random, and fully expecting he'll be alone - which is probably for the worst, with his limited combat options, but it would still be fun.

Except he isn't alone.]

...I wasn't expecting to see you here, Mr. Winter.

[He wasn't expecting anyone at all - but it could be worse! It could have been the admin.]

The odds were certainly against it...

[ Enough so that, at least for a few seconds, he has to be justifiably suspicious. A glitch? Or some kind of way to see where other players went?

...Even to Michel's paranoid nature, that seems a little extreme. If anything it's most likely the system just didn't seed its random numbers particularly well. He'll test that later, if he's in the mood. ]

Here to look into the keyword, I assume?

[ Should he wonder how and why he's become "Mister"? Hm. ]

Of course. I had to see for myself what everyone was throwing a fit about.

[He looks over Michel, checking out his stats real quickly.]

You’re lucky someone with healing spells ended up in the same Area as you.

[Though it’s up in the air if he’ll actually… heal Michel…]

I'd like it to be. Though not a real detective. Maybe one from the stories.

[He follows dutifully, though, falling silent as he goes along - when Owen sits, he stands, a little gangly awkward guy, before deciding to sit down as well.]

Mm. [He's clearly a little uncomfortable, but he feels like he has to answer.] Not actively tried. But I sure have thought about it more often than not.

And you're lucky to run into someone who can do damage.

[ More a reflexive grumble than anything. Owen is max level, and Macabre Dancer is a good combination with Blade Brandier. He's tentatively satisfied with this luck, actually. ]

Do you see any reason not to run it together?

[ Owen's just going to get a party request as he asks, actually. More efficient. ]

[Owen's first thought is of Poirot, and he imagines Anaido with a silly little mustache for a moment.

That would probably be too weird.]

What's keeping you from trying, if you're thinking about it so much? Are you afraid of what comes next?

[Ughhhh, he guesses he'll accept the party request... It'll be faster to clear this dungeon together, at least, and the faster they're through the faster he can get back to being an edgy loner.]

Fine, fine. Do you want to lead the way, then, Mr. DPS?

No, I don't really care too much about the concept of an afterlife.

[It's never been some major concern whether his soul goes to heaven or hell or nowhere.]

I think I just distract myself. My own brain is like a pedestrian walking into a road to stop the speeding car and managing to stop it last minute. Plus, I just don't want it to hurt.

So it's a fleeting fancy.

[He crosses his legs, leaning forward and resting his arms on his knees, turning his gaze on the empty arena.

This is too much for - what, his second conversation with someone? But it's so strange, and there's something about Owen that's... concerned, even if he'd never admit it. Maybe it's because of his own experiences, or maybe it's just how Anaido seems to swerve between idiotic and eerily perspective that it feels like just being upfront and open about things is going to be less painful then trying to hide things.]

...Depending on what you do, it won't be painful. I tried, before, and while it clearly didn't work out... the worst part was waking up in hospital afterwards, still alive and still feeling miserable.

[He huffs, still looking forward.]

After that happened, I moved to America. Got handed money to go wherever I wanted to, and since then I haven't tried again - can't afford the hospital bills if I just fail again.

[Plus, now he has his dogs. Three living creatures that are depending on him, but he's talked about them enough.]

...I suppose saying "I'm sorry" for the hospital thing would be in bad taste. But in general, I'm sorry you had to go through with that whole ordeal in general.

[He's honest about it - he has to be, but this time he does mean it, he would've said it regardless. He stares forward for a moment, before heaving a sigh, glancing back towards the other man.]

Mm. I heard a lot of horror stories about American healthcare. Really don't blame you. [A beat.] Do you....regret trying? Or no?

[ Owen doesn't know how to be an edgy loner in a party? Skill issue tbh.

Michel moves ahead, pausing for just a brief skeptical look over his shoulder. He was going to do it anyway, but it's dodgy to be prompted... ]

I can hold aggro without being a literal meat shield, you know.

[ He's still going to take the lead, but he's just saying. ]

…Mm. It is what it is.

[It’s not like he’s the only person in the world with self-destructive tendencies, and he doesn’t want to be pitied. He’s made his choices, and there’s nothing to be done to change the past.

Not that he wants to.]

No. I don’t. Sure, it was a stupid thing to do, but I’ve done a lot of stupid things, and there’s nothing to be gained from dwelling on whether I wish the outcome was different or if I should have done it at all. It wasn’t even my first brush with death, but…

[Maybe that’s why the call of the void was so powerful.

He shrugs, feigning nonchalance.]

Like I said, it’s simply… what it is. What happens next is more important, isn’t it?

...It is.

[He doesn't know exactly what to say, but he folds his arms in his lap, tapping his fingers in threes. One two three. One two three.]

Regardless. [Another pause.] I'm glad that even after everything, I get to talk to someone like you. I'm glad to have that chance. You should be glad to have that chance too, no matter what you think about it.

I’m just covering my bases.

[Sorry that he doesn’t trust Michel as far as he can throw him! Even if they’re party members that doesn’t mean Michel will do his job, as far as Owen knows.

Trust no one. Not even yourself.]

Do you want me to buff you or not?

[The tapping is what gets him to finally look back at Anaido, but he keeps his eye on his hands and not his face.]

…Well, of course you should be glad to have met me. I’m great company.

[Is he really, though…]

So don’t go doing something stupid or risky because things feel like too much, or it would have just been a waste of all the energy spent to get here. You want to make connections with people, right? Real, genuine ones.

I certainly didn't send the party request just to put on a show for you...

[ Buffs are what Macabre Dancers do, right? Although Winter lets out the deepest sigh when he spots the telltale cloud of bee commandos on the horizon as they approach. ]

Why is it always bees?

There's that ever present arrogance again. It's fine. I think it's charming coming from you, so you are great company.

[He chuckles a little.]

Oh, you're worried about me? Ahaha. I'll do my best. I worked so hard to at least get to this point. What's a little more? Besides, it's exciting. I've met more people here than I ever have.

...Charming?

[He doesn't have this attitude to be charming, and he certainly wasn't expecting to get a response like that. He was expecting an eyeroll, something dismissive, something that would just - lighten up the mood.]

I didn't say I was worried.

[Shut up!!]

...but that is one of the better parts of big games like this. You can meet people from everywhere, who don't know you, who only have how you present yourself to them to judge you by. It's nice.

Yeah, charming. And admit ittttttt you were a little worried.

[He reaches over to poke the man in the shoulder, beaming like a loon.]

Exactly! People can meet me on a level that doesn't have all that baggage. Isn't that nice? Though it still is a shame. In a way, it's still not complete connection because of the virtual nature of it all. It's good enough, though.

Well, it’s not like we’re outside of the first level range yet.

[There’s a limited enemy pool, probably.

Owen raises his fans, casting La Corv to give Michel a little boost for this first engagement.]

You’re not allergic, are you?

You have an interesting idea of what's charming.

[He's not admitting anything, so he's just not! Going to address that!]

I don't know that I believe that - you can meet a person in the "real" world, but that still doesn't mean it's a "complete" connection. People can have put up so many walls the distance between you doesn't matter.

[He shifts, feeling awkward about the poking. It's not that it's necessarily unwelcome, he's just not used to such casual touching.]

...But a place like this you can do almost anything worth doing in the real world, anyways. You can touch people, fight with them, do whatever you want. The only real difference is you can choose to leave and come back whenever you want, but I think it makes the amount of connection about equal.

But not a bad idea of what's charming.

[Hm. Hm. So many walls, huh. He knows that feeling. Walls upon walls upon walls. And it doesn't feel like enough.]

I guess that's true, but...if it's so wonderful, why not have it replace in-person interaction? There's something to that that this game can't replicate, I think. It feels a little lonely. Besides, these are avatars, too. It's nice to see people as they are, sometimes...

[Most people would probably think it's a bad idea, but it still is... sort of praise for Owen? He thinks? So he can't complain too much...]

Questionable but not bad, at least going off what I know you think is charming.

[As long as he's more charming then the likes of Hien and 0koto...!!!

But, hm.]

Instead of the idealized versions of themselves some people are putting forward? How much have you changed about yourself, Anaido?

[Though there's no arguing that some of this feels a bit hollow, or... more separated from his real life. The odds of Owen ever seeing Anaido in person are so slim that it feels less dangerous to be candid with him, but at the same time it makes it easier to write this whole thing off.]

Are you putting yourself across as you are, or are you playing pretend like everyone else?

[...]

Is that what you actually mean, with "complete connection"? That these avatars and mechanics make people less genuine?

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(no subject)

>anaido, suicide cw continues,,,,

~8/4, oh no melon

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it SURE DOES...

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