Who ⚔ Yael & assorted nerds What ⚔ A dungeon run and other things When ⚔ After the party Where ⚔ Errywhere Content Warnings ⚔ Men with their tits out? Alcohol??? No correlation there surprisingly. nsfw i'm sorry mom
[ He wants to believe Sheza doesn't care, but... maybe deep down he does. Ah, but Fai should take him at face value, shouldn't he? He can't help but go back and forth in his mind until he settles on not thinking about it any longer. ]
Good reasons to them, I'm sure.
[ And really, Fai can't fault them for it. His family is very close knit. ]
My uncle killed my parents, and I testified against him. My family never thought he was guilty, but I always did.
[ What he doesn't add is that he was scared, pressure from the investigators and the general public getting to him and making him feel like he had no other choice when all he wanted to do was run away from it all. ]
[Yikes doesn't begin to cover it. Yael's fingers briefly still, but it's a long enough pause that Yuui's surely picked up on it. When his hands resume moving, Yael's tone is just as steady, even, and disaffected.
So it would seem. In reality, his heart breaks for Yuui.]
The right thing is never the easy thing to do. Doing the right thing usually pisses people off too.
[It's good people like Yuui who suffer for their pure hearts. Yael swallows back a sigh, palming Yuui's forehead and guiding him back against his chest and pressing a brief kiss to his temple. He can't help himself.]
You're better off without people like that, family be damned.
[ This was the sort of reaction he expected, but it still takes him by surprise anyway, and it's evident in the way his eyes slightly widen when Sheza presses his lips to his temple. ]
That's the conclusion I came to, eventually. It's why I never bothered going back to Norway either.
[ As much as he wanted to see the town he grew up in and his parents' old home, the thought of potentially seeing his family out and about made him feel ill.
...Part of him wonders if Sheza has any similar feelings about Egypt. Is he worried about seeing his ex? ]
Makes sense. You've got a lot of baggage waiting for you back there.
[How presumptuous would it be to say that they could go there and make their own new, pleasant memories? Too presumptuous for a man who has lost his lover's trust.
Yael, knowing better than to be greedy, lets Yuui go. He returns to scrubbing his back, hands sweeping lower and skirting along the edge of the water.]
There's no point in going home if nothing pleasant is waiting for you there.
[ He bends forward a bit, exposing the lower part of his back to Sheza. ]
No, there isn't.
[ That much Fai agrees with, though... is it so bad to continue on with his fantasies of seeing where he grew up with Sheza? Maybe he doesn't deserve it, with the way he's opened up about his lack of trust, but he can dream. ]
I think you'd like seeing a fjord, at least. Or the Northern Lights.
[ If they ever manage to get out of this game, that is. ]
[ It's a quick, almost reflexive answer to Sheza's question that he doesn't think much of as his heart aches for more acknowledgement to the sentiment behind his mention of it.
Maybe he's lost the right to Sheza's sentimentality. Fai wouldn't be able to blame him for taking that right away from him, not in the least. ]
Other than my apartment? [ With Mokona and you there, of course. ] I think Iceland would be fun to visit. What about you?
[ Sheza and his rude, juicy ass. Fai knocks his elbow back to get poke him right in the solar plexus for that. ]
Japan would be fun...
[ He tries to keep his wording vague, unsure if Sheza would even want to go together... though he'd like to. The tense layer underpinning their conversation is difficult to navigate. ]
I want to try the desserts there.
[ Naturally, his mind goes to the pastries, especially the street food. ]
[Oww. Those bony little elbows pack a surprising punch, but Yael laughs off Yuui's assault to continue diligently scrubbing him clean. With his back out of the way, he's moved onto his upper arms, sudsy cloth gliding over the curve of a shoulder.]
Of course. [Yuui has always been a fan of sweets, hasn't he? Such a child.] Those fancy little strawberry cakes are practically made for you. I could see you sitting in a café window with a slice of the stuff and a fancy latte watching all the cute boys walk by.
[ His shoulders relax with Sheza’s careful work, the smell of the soap he’s using pleasant to his nose. If they’re going to be stuck in this game, at least the soap smells nice. ]
I’d have more than one slice, I’m sure.
[ He'd definitely look out for the attractive men, too, though…
He takes a risk. ]
I don’t know how much people watching I’d do if you’re sitting across from me, though.
[Note: don't get stuck in an MMO where the soap stinks. You'll have a bad time.
Ah... Yuui's timing is pretty auspicious. Just as Yael was fighting the urge to pull Yuui back against him and wrap his arms around those slender shoulders, he's extending an olive branch. The suggestion gives him pause, if only long enough to imagine a future in which they'll find themselves in a beautiful country surrounded by beautiful people refusing to look anywhere else but at each other.]
No?
[You've got a type, Yael thinks, but he stays his tongue. He won't risk saying something like that and trivializing Yuui's feelings as a result.]
You're a lot like that cat of yours. Sometimes I catch you sitting there staring at me. Should I start feeding you out of a can?
Edited (wait i can make it ruder) 2024-01-03 20:06 (UTC)
It's payback for how much you stared at me when we first met.
[ He'll never forget the thrill of fully capturing the attention of a man who makes every effort to appear as detached from his surroundings as possible. ]
Anyway, if you give me expensive food, I won't mind.
[And he isn't afraid to state that plainly. Yuui is and has always been a gem among lumps of coal. That sentiment goes well beyond looks.
Ah, fuck it. Yael withdraws the cloth and taps Yuui's shoulder in the manner he usually does when he's signaling for him to lay back against his chest. If he refuses? No harm, no foul. Yael won't be offended.]
You better not leave any behind on the plate. Cleaning up crusty plates is a pain in the ass.
[ Compliments from Sheza mean so much more than they do from anyone else. Whether that's because those compliments are rare or due to Sheza's special place in his heart, it's hard to say.
...Except it really isn't. Fai knows well that it's because Sheza has his heart, especially when he leans back against his chest without a second thought. His body is as warm and welcoming as always, the muscles in his chest sitting firm against his back. ]
I have to leave you with some work to do, don't I? [ He reaches back behind himself to take Sheza's hand. ] While we're stuck here with nothing to do but fight monsters, let's come up with a little global itinerary for the two of us.
[Being free from banal chores is supposed to be one of the virtues of dating another man... if that man isn't the sort of attractive man whose angelic visage screams "do I look like I work for a living?" Yuui does, of course. He's a hardworking and intelligent man and fiercely independent... but he's also high maintenance. Those waifish looks and that big fat brain comes at a price.
Ah well. Yael sighs, more in singsong than any sort of ill-timed, woe-is-me exasperation. He chose this life. He chose Yuui. Squeezing his chosen babygirl's hand, Yael rests his cheek on the curve of one bony shoulder.]
Alright, but you're gonna have to clue me in on what a global itinerary is.
[ That sigh is much more preferable than one of genuine grievance, and it makes Fai smile despite himself. If he asks cutely enough, he knows Sheza will pick up a broom and get to work. That's something he'll play around with when they finally leave this game.
But right now Sheza's cheek is so warm against his skin that Fai can feel that warmth blossom from that spot on his shoulder to the rest of his body, endlessly comforting in combination with the bath. ]
We make note of where and when we want to visit certain spots in various countries. Say I want to go to the pyramids and a restaurant nearby also happens to look good... we'll tie those into one activity.
[ He doesn't plan on sticking to a schedule per se, but being organized is important. Giving Sheza's hand a quick squeeze in return, he turns his head to glance at him. ]
I expect you to put things you want to do on that list too, you know. You're terrible when it comes to admitting you want something.
[You want to talk about comforting? Yael is the one enjoying the lion's share of the comfort here, suffused in Yuui's warmth, slotted against him like one puzzle piece into another. Their situation is a bizarre and fucked up one, but it's tolerable so long as Yuui remains by his side.
All the more reason to fight for him. All the more reason to fight for them.]
You know why that is?
[Why he's so terrible at admitting that he wants something?]
I don't even know how much I want something until it's already gone. Don't expect me to come up with a laundry list of sights to see and shit to eat.
[ But he means it in the best way he possibly can. In some regards, Sheza is the kitten here, one that Fai has taken in and fed fancy canned food and treating his wounded leg.
Cat metaphors aside however, he scoots back to press up against Sheza more. ]
I want a few things. You know I like doing things you want to do... even if it's hiking.
[Hopeless is as hopeless does. For as much effort Yael has put into building himself into a man who can function without the aid of others, he would be lost if not for the kindness of people like Yuui. Without love, some bright and gleaming gem to covet, he would have nothing at all.
He hugs Yuui tight to his chest, breathing in his scent and savoring his warmth on his lips.]
[ He laughs softly, giving Sheza's hand a playful squeeze. He's never entertained visiting Istanbul, but he's heard it's a beautiful city, so he has no complaints.
But he'd go to Antarctica if Sheza asked him to—with a few complaints then, of course. ]
[Yael can count the number of people in his life who have called him cute on one hand. Look at him. He's as cute as a slavering brown bear, which is to say not very cute at all.]
And I don't know about going that far. I'm pretty sure we'll see cats all over the place. As long as we stock up on tuna, we'll find plenty.
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[Yael chuffs. Laughs. Yuui really does have the wrong idea... but Yael hesitates to correct him.
Idiot. I wouldn't be here if I hadn't chosen you over him.
...Yeah. He'll keep that one close to his chest for now.]
Do they hate you for good reasons?
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Good reasons to them, I'm sure.
[ And really, Fai can't fault them for it. His family is very close knit. ]
My uncle killed my parents, and I testified against him. My family never thought he was guilty, but I always did.
[ What he doesn't add is that he was scared, pressure from the investigators and the general public getting to him and making him feel like he had no other choice when all he wanted to do was run away from it all. ]
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So it would seem. In reality, his heart breaks for Yuui.]
The right thing is never the easy thing to do. Doing the right thing usually pisses people off too.
[It's good people like Yuui who suffer for their pure hearts. Yael swallows back a sigh, palming Yuui's forehead and guiding him back against his chest and pressing a brief kiss to his temple. He can't help himself.]
You're better off without people like that, family be damned.
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That's the conclusion I came to, eventually. It's why I never bothered going back to Norway either.
[ As much as he wanted to see the town he grew up in and his parents' old home, the thought of potentially seeing his family out and about made him feel ill.
...Part of him wonders if Sheza has any similar feelings about Egypt. Is he worried about seeing his ex? ]
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[How presumptuous would it be to say that they could go there and make their own new, pleasant memories? Too presumptuous for a man who has lost his lover's trust.
Yael, knowing better than to be greedy, lets Yuui go. He returns to scrubbing his back, hands sweeping lower and skirting along the edge of the water.]
There's no point in going home if nothing pleasant is waiting for you there.
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No, there isn't.
[ That much Fai agrees with, though... is it so bad to continue on with his fantasies of seeing where he grew up with Sheza? Maybe he doesn't deserve it, with the way he's opened up about his lack of trust, but he can dream. ]
I think you'd like seeing a fjord, at least. Or the Northern Lights.
[ If they ever manage to get out of this game, that is. ]
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[I'd love to see one some time, whatever it is. It's better to keep wistful language like that off his tongue, especially now.
Yael continues his dutiful ministrations, working his cloth along the lower half of Yuui's back.]
If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
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[ It's a quick, almost reflexive answer to Sheza's question that he doesn't think much of as his heart aches for more acknowledgement to the sentiment behind his mention of it.
Maybe he's lost the right to Sheza's sentimentality. Fai wouldn't be able to blame him for taking that right away from him, not in the least. ]
Other than my apartment? [ With Mokona and you there, of course. ] I think Iceland would be fun to visit. What about you?
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[Note that there is zero interest in Yael's voice. In fact, he just tried and failed to conceal a yawn.]
I've never thought much about traveling for leisure before. I've been stationed in Japan, India, and obviously the US, but that's about it. Maybe...
[Yael tips his head back, humming.]
...I'd like to go back to Japan. I've got my issues with the place, but the food is good. The bathhouses too.
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Japan would be fun...
[ He tries to keep his wording vague, unsure if Sheza would even want to go together... though he'd like to. The tense layer underpinning their conversation is difficult to navigate. ]
I want to try the desserts there.
[ Naturally, his mind goes to the pastries, especially the street food. ]
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Of course. [Yuui has always been a fan of sweets, hasn't he? Such a child.] Those fancy little strawberry cakes are practically made for you. I could see you sitting in a café window with a slice of the stuff and a fancy latte watching all the cute boys walk by.
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I’d have more than one slice, I’m sure.
[ He'd definitely look out for the attractive men, too, though…
He takes a risk. ]
I don’t know how much people watching I’d do if you’re sitting across from me, though.
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Ah... Yuui's timing is pretty auspicious. Just as Yael was fighting the urge to pull Yuui back against him and wrap his arms around those slender shoulders, he's extending an olive branch. The suggestion gives him pause, if only long enough to imagine a future in which they'll find themselves in a beautiful country surrounded by beautiful people refusing to look anywhere else but at each other.]
No?
[You've got a type, Yael thinks, but he stays his tongue. He won't risk saying something like that and trivializing Yuui's feelings as a result.]
You're a lot like that cat of yours. Sometimes I catch you sitting there staring at me. Should I start feeding you out of a can?
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[ He'll never forget the thrill of fully capturing the attention of a man who makes every effort to appear as detached from his surroundings as possible. ]
Anyway, if you give me expensive food, I won't mind.
[ He's a luxury cat, after all. ]
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[And he isn't afraid to state that plainly. Yuui is and has always been a gem among lumps of coal. That sentiment goes well beyond looks.
Ah, fuck it. Yael withdraws the cloth and taps Yuui's shoulder in the manner he usually does when he's signaling for him to lay back against his chest. If he refuses? No harm, no foul. Yael won't be offended.]
You better not leave any behind on the plate. Cleaning up crusty plates is a pain in the ass.
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...Except it really isn't. Fai knows well that it's because Sheza has his heart, especially when he leans back against his chest without a second thought. His body is as warm and welcoming as always, the muscles in his chest sitting firm against his back. ]
I have to leave you with some work to do, don't I? [ He reaches back behind himself to take Sheza's hand. ] While we're stuck here with nothing to do but fight monsters, let's come up with a little global itinerary for the two of us.
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[Being free from banal chores is supposed to be one of the virtues of dating another man... if that man isn't the sort of attractive man whose angelic visage screams "do I look like I work for a living?" Yuui does, of course. He's a hardworking and intelligent man and fiercely independent... but he's also high maintenance. Those waifish looks and that big fat brain comes at a price.
Ah well. Yael sighs, more in singsong than any sort of ill-timed, woe-is-me exasperation. He chose this life. He chose Yuui. Squeezing his chosen babygirl's hand, Yael rests his cheek on the curve of one bony shoulder.]
Alright, but you're gonna have to clue me in on what a global itinerary is.
no subject
But right now Sheza's cheek is so warm against his skin that Fai can feel that warmth blossom from that spot on his shoulder to the rest of his body, endlessly comforting in combination with the bath. ]
We make note of where and when we want to visit certain spots in various countries. Say I want to go to the pyramids and a restaurant nearby also happens to look good... we'll tie those into one activity.
[ He doesn't plan on sticking to a schedule per se, but being organized is important. Giving Sheza's hand a quick squeeze in return, he turns his head to glance at him. ]
I expect you to put things you want to do on that list too, you know. You're terrible when it comes to admitting you want something.
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All the more reason to fight for him. All the more reason to fight for them.]
You know why that is?
[Why he's so terrible at admitting that he wants something?]
I don't even know how much I want something until it's already gone. Don't expect me to come up with a laundry list of sights to see and shit to eat.
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[ But he means it in the best way he possibly can. In some regards, Sheza is the kitten here, one that Fai has taken in and fed fancy canned food and treating his wounded leg.
Cat metaphors aside however, he scoots back to press up against Sheza more. ]
I want a few things. You know I like doing things you want to do... even if it's hiking.
[ He'll do it. ]
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He hugs Yuui tight to his chest, breathing in his scent and savoring his warmth on his lips.]
...I want to go to Istanbul.
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[ He laughs softly, giving Sheza's hand a playful squeeze. He's never entertained visiting Istanbul, but he's heard it's a beautiful city, so he has no complaints.
But he'd go to Antarctica if Sheza asked him to—with a few complaints then, of course. ]
Why Istanbul?
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[It's a simple answer. Cats. If Yuui could see him properly right now, he'd see the blush running for the tips of his ears.]
They call it the cat capital of the world. We'd both get some mileage out of that.
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You're so cute.
[ In many ways, Sheza isn't, but when it comes to animals? He's incredibly cute. The rest of his personality only makes this facet of him cuter. ]
Maybe there's a cat lovers guide to Istanbul out there I can find when we leave this place.
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[Yael can count the number of people in his life who have called him cute on one hand. Look at him. He's as cute as a slavering brown bear, which is to say not very cute at all.]
And I don't know about going that far. I'm pretty sure we'll see cats all over the place. As long as we stock up on tuna, we'll find plenty.
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