[ No visible reaction. Not at first, but when he feels the gentle squeeze, Albedo sits there only wanting more.
He is certain he's thought about his ambitions, chief of all that he recalls imperative. For his own sake, and to "discover the truth of this world".
Originally, maybe it was not this one. But perhaps it is now this one and reality itself.
Does he know the answer still? Has his heart given into despair? The loneliness encircling him compels him to care little. But it also makes him desperate to reach out for people to call friends. If he does so, can he really call them as much? Or is he being delusional?
Won't they abandon him when all is said and done? He wouldn't blame them. ]
...I haven't even told you. Of my dreams, of my ambitions.
[ ...Albedo can only smile faintly. Maybe Noé wouldn't leave him. Maybe...it can still be something that remains. That persists, and lives, despite it all. ]
But, I would like that.
[ Even if Albedo can't believe it. He wants to believe in Noé. Would that mean that somehow he's wrong? He can't imagine it, but he doesn't pull away from where their hands are joined. ]
You don't need to tell me specifics. You told me -- you told me you were a scientist. I can only imagine how much more there is left to discover in the world that we can truly call "home", and how much you'd like to uncover it all.
[ "Home" is not not here. He's sure of it, now, even if he can't recall much about who he used to be.
Slowly, he lowers their hands, but he doesn't let go. Not yet. Instead, he just places them onto his lap. ]
Even if there's no one there for you now, you'll have people who will be, when this is over. People who will help you preserve your work and explore the world alongside you. I know I will.
[ And as Noé Archiviste, he can do that. When Memoir inevitably remembers that he was a traveler, he can make good on his promise even more. ]
So...hold onto that, and even if there's only a 1% chance that you're alive there, that's more than no chance at all.
[ ...How odd. There is never any certainty, especially less so in regards to his own position. But all the same, each time the other man speaks, he wants to believe.
He can do that, can't he? Even if the odds and logical reasoning is indicative that the idea of holding onto such hope is futile. Even if those words have incurred within him such a desire. ]
You would explore the world with me? To try to unearth all its mysteries?
[ Even when he knows nothing of him? Even when he is uncertain that he is anywhere near 'normal'?
Albedo has let go of such hopes so long ago, that he would be able to see beyond the world, and pragmatism still keeps himself so grounded that he could never truly entertain that hope for long.
But, he can believe in Noé. And if he believes in him, maybe somehow, against all logic and reason, that hope will be made manifest. ]
...As long as you don't let go.
[ As long as he has Noé with him, he can nurse just a tiny bit of hope. So, those words are spoken, softly, wanting to hear the other speak again. With that infectious hope that his own life has been preserved. That he will still stand by him, even if he is an unconventional person. That he will not turn upon him with jealousy for being who he is, even if his accomplishments are forgotten.
So, for the first time Albedo reaches for hope. And looks at Noé again, who is like a star of brightness in a dark ocean of unfathomable liminal space. ]
[ The quiet request makes Memoir chuckle. It's quiet but no less warm, and finally, he smiles. ]
"Let go"?
[ And just like that, he releases Albedo's hand –
but only so he can take it in his again, and intertwine their fingers.
Something warm blooms in his chest. It's warmer than the "love" he felt for Macha. It flourishes with the desire to protect, to explore, to walk alongside Albedo. He is only now realizing that there may have been a deeper reason why he didn't leave him in the graveyard.
[ ...Is it strange? That his heartbeat quickened for one of the few times he has been in this game. No, this is, in fact, the second time. Feeling something like a semblance of foolish anxiety when the other released his hand, wondering if he had said something wrong.
But, ah – he had been wondering, what exactly he himself meant by wanting 'more', and this seems...fitting. An alien warmth continues to flood through his chest, at this, and remains where it is.
A soft, gentle smile unfolds on the blond's lips when he gazes upon Noé with a look he has never granted anyone else. ]
Logically speaking, you would have a reasonable number of reasons to do exactly that.
...But, I am ever so glad that you have no interest in seeking that as an option. Even if I am rather used to being by my lonesome, and certainly could make do, I believe I would have found it disappointing.
[ Albedo feels a light stinging in his cheeks; not enough to bring an obvious flush, but his ears tint a little red.
And, well, with their hands intertwined...he gives a little squeeze. ]
Maybe so. The world is yours to explore...but isn't it more fun to do it with someone else?
[ That's how he sees it, anyway. He knows that whatever journey he went on in the real world, was one he went on with other people. He can't imagine having no one and persisting for so long without anyone to support you.
It's a good thing Albedo won't have to worry about that anymore, then, and Memoir – no, Noé will make sure he'll have all the company he needs to enjoy life again.
It would be. In the past, I'd honestly say no. I never much liked the company of many people, if at all any.
[ He is the most hermit of hermits. At least, Albedo is certain that hasn't changed in some ways, though in others he is happy to enjoy the company if it is certain people. Of who he is more inclined to pointedly seek out these days.
Seeing him duck his head like that after his smile grows...it does something to him. His smile does not get any bigger, but there's another wave of undeniable warmth in the face of it. ]
Of course. [ Tentatively: ] And—and then...
[ After, he means. If it so happens he's still alive, and his body is still around so he can walk on his own two feet, it can mean only good things from here. He tells himself to reign in that optimism, so he just shakes his head, but there is the hint of a smile still. ]
[ Noé doesn't bother asking him to say the rest. Instead, his free hand moves up to gently rest on Albedo's back. Slowly, he pulls the other in for a quiet, warm embrace, while not letting go of his hand.
Albedo must have been lonely. Noé can hear a hint of hope in the way he speaks. It's why he felt compelled to hug him and remind him of the sort of company he seemed to have longed for, deep down. ]
And then...you won't have to do it by yourself any longer.
[ Albedo is easy to direct into an embrace; a gentle touch against his back and a pull...just like that he's against the other man. Easy to hold and press his head against Noé's chest.
With his free hand, he slides it around the other male. ]
If you keep speaking like that, it feels as if everything will somehow work out. Against all logic and reason.
[ It's so warm. He doesn't remember what being held is like. ]
Of course things will work out. Logic and reason don't account for miracles.
[ And he believes in them. One will happen for Albedo. He's sure of it.
He's not sure what he's doing, but he holds the other securely, like he wants to keep him safe. He absolutely does, and he's content to sit here like this for a while... ]
...You can say that life doesn't exist without miracles, yes.
After all, birth is a miracle of life. Even science recognizes that.
[ Albedo pulls back reluctantly. ]
Just like it recognizes the fact you should be eating some more nutritional than dessert. Keep yourself here and I shall fetch you something to eat.
[ He gets up and begins to head to leave the room to put something together for the other man, apparently unwilling to hear any potential arguments against it. ]
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no subject
He is certain he's thought about his ambitions, chief of all that he recalls imperative. For his own sake, and to "discover the truth of this world".
Originally, maybe it was not this one. But perhaps it is now this one and reality itself.
Does he know the answer still? Has his heart given into despair? The loneliness encircling him compels him to care little. But it also makes him desperate to reach out for people to call friends. If he does so, can he really call them as much? Or is he being delusional?
Won't they abandon him when all is said and done? He wouldn't blame them. ]
...I haven't even told you. Of my dreams, of my ambitions.
[ ...Albedo can only smile faintly. Maybe Noé wouldn't leave him. Maybe...it can still be something that remains. That persists, and lives, despite it all. ]
But, I would like that.
[ Even if Albedo can't believe it. He wants to believe in Noé. Would that mean that somehow he's wrong? He can't imagine it, but he doesn't pull away from where their hands are joined. ]
no subject
[ "Home" is not not here. He's sure of it, now, even if he can't recall much about who he used to be.
Slowly, he lowers their hands, but he doesn't let go. Not yet. Instead, he just places them onto his lap. ]
Even if there's no one there for you now, you'll have people who will be, when this is over. People who will help you preserve your work and explore the world alongside you. I know I will.
[ And as Noé Archiviste, he can do that. When Memoir inevitably remembers that he was a traveler, he can make good on his promise even more. ]
So...hold onto that, and even if there's only a 1% chance that you're alive there, that's more than no chance at all.
no subject
He can do that, can't he? Even if the odds and logical reasoning is indicative that the idea of holding onto such hope is futile. Even if those words have incurred within him such a desire. ]
You would explore the world with me? To try to unearth all its mysteries?
[ Even when he knows nothing of him? Even when he is uncertain that he is anywhere near 'normal'?
Albedo has let go of such hopes so long ago, that he would be able to see beyond the world, and pragmatism still keeps himself so grounded that he could never truly entertain that hope for long.
But, he can believe in Noé. And if he believes in him, maybe somehow, against all logic and reason, that hope will be made manifest. ]
...As long as you don't let go.
[ As long as he has Noé with him, he can nurse just a tiny bit of hope. So, those words are spoken, softly, wanting to hear the other speak again. With that infectious hope that his own life has been preserved. That he will still stand by him, even if he is an unconventional person. That he will not turn upon him with jealousy for being who he is, even if his accomplishments are forgotten.
So, for the first time Albedo reaches for hope. And looks at Noé again, who is like a star of brightness in a dark ocean of unfathomable liminal space. ]
no subject
"Let go"?
[ And just like that, he releases Albedo's hand –
but only so he can take it in his again, and intertwine their fingers.
Something warm blooms in his chest. It's warmer than the "love" he felt for Macha. It flourishes with the desire to protect, to explore, to walk alongside Albedo. He is only now realizing that there may have been a deeper reason why he didn't leave him in the graveyard.
As for letting go... ]
Why would I ever do that?
no subject
But, ah – he had been wondering, what exactly he himself meant by wanting 'more', and this seems...fitting. An alien warmth continues to flood through his chest, at this, and remains where it is.
A soft, gentle smile unfolds on the blond's lips when he gazes upon Noé with a look he has never granted anyone else. ]
Logically speaking, you would have a reasonable number of reasons to do exactly that.
...But, I am ever so glad that you have no interest in seeking that as an option. Even if I am rather used to being by my lonesome, and certainly could make do, I believe I would have found it disappointing.
[ Albedo feels a light stinging in his cheeks; not enough to bring an obvious flush, but his ears tint a little red.
And, well, with their hands intertwined...he gives a little squeeze. ]
no subject
[ That's how he sees it, anyway. He knows that whatever journey he went on in the real world, was one he went on with other people. He can't imagine having no one and persisting for so long without anyone to support you.
It's a good thing Albedo won't have to worry about that anymore, then, and Memoir – no, Noé will make sure he'll have all the company he needs to enjoy life again.
He has to duck his head as his smile broadens. ]
We can keep on doing that, even while we're here.
no subject
[ He is the most hermit of hermits. At least, Albedo is certain that hasn't changed in some ways, though in others he is happy to enjoy the company if it is certain people. Of who he is more inclined to pointedly seek out these days.
Seeing him duck his head like that after his smile grows...it does something to him. His smile does not get any bigger, but there's another wave of undeniable warmth in the face of it. ]
Of course. [ Tentatively: ] And—and then...
[ After, he means. If it so happens he's still alive, and his body is still around so he can walk on his own two feet, it can mean only good things from here. He tells himself to reign in that optimism, so he just shakes his head, but there is the hint of a smile still. ]
no subject
[ Noé doesn't bother asking him to say the rest. Instead, his free hand moves up to gently rest on Albedo's back. Slowly, he pulls the other in for a quiet, warm embrace, while not letting go of his hand.
Albedo must have been lonely. Noé can hear a hint of hope in the way he speaks. It's why he felt compelled to hug him and remind him of the sort of company he seemed to have longed for, deep down. ]
And then...you won't have to do it by yourself any longer.
no subject
With his free hand, he slides it around the other male. ]
If you keep speaking like that, it feels as if everything will somehow work out. Against all logic and reason.
[ It's so warm. He doesn't remember what being held is like. ]
1/2
[ And he believes in them. One will happen for Albedo. He's sure of it.
He's not sure what he's doing, but he holds the other securely, like he wants to keep him safe. He absolutely does, and he's content to sit here like this for a while... ]
no subject
Oops. ]
...Oh.
no subject
After all, birth is a miracle of life. Even science recognizes that.
[ Albedo pulls back reluctantly. ]
Just like it recognizes the fact you should be eating some more nutritional than dessert. Keep yourself here and I shall fetch you something to eat.
[ He gets up and begins to head to leave the room to put something together for the other man, apparently unwilling to hear any potential arguments against it. ]