[ Ganymede knows him well enough to anticipate that much, at least; Michel's smiles are usually fleeting, and his expression slips quickly back into its customary neutral reserve.
It had hurt. Deeply. Constantly. But the idea that Ganymede thinks he's stronger now, spiked with the bitter knowledge that he's hardly changed at all, draws a brief, humorless laugh from him.
Strong enough to stand on his own feet? Isn't it only that he's too tired even to die? ]
There is no way to live in the world without vulnerabilities. If you feel, you can be hurt.
[ The words are too harsh. He can't say that to Ganymede after what they've just seen of each other. He doesn't want the darkness that still has its claws sunk into him all the way to his bones to reach out for Ganymede. He draws in a deeper breath, then another, his hands grasping Ganymede's more tightly again.
It hurts to disillusion Ganymede about him, too. But Michel is a terrible liar. He's fought against it for too long for it to come naturally now. Can he at least lie to himself, that he can act out Ganymede's image of him until he could truthfully live up to it? ]
I don't know what I can tell you. The world continues to move, and I am simply waiting. But while anything remains of my spirit, I will wait. That... is the sum total of the courage I possess.
idk whether this roll was a success or not; cw: suicidal ideation
It had hurt. Deeply. Constantly. But the idea that Ganymede thinks he's stronger now, spiked with the bitter knowledge that he's hardly changed at all, draws a brief, humorless laugh from him.
Strong enough to stand on his own feet? Isn't it only that he's too tired even to die? ]
There is no way to live in the world without vulnerabilities. If you feel, you can be hurt.
[ The words are too harsh. He can't say that to Ganymede after what they've just seen of each other. He doesn't want the darkness that still has its claws sunk into him all the way to his bones to reach out for Ganymede. He draws in a deeper breath, then another, his hands grasping Ganymede's more tightly again.
It hurts to disillusion Ganymede about him, too. But Michel is a terrible liar. He's fought against it for too long for it to come naturally now. Can he at least lie to himself, that he can act out Ganymede's image of him until he could truthfully live up to it? ]
I don't know what I can tell you. The world continues to move, and I am simply waiting. But while anything remains of my spirit, I will wait. That... is the sum total of the courage I possess.